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  Salt and Light
Posted by: novice62 - 02-09-2017, 10:09 PM - Forum: Song Critiques - Replies (6)

Here's one that is a musical arrangement done by long time CSN contributor....Sarah Noll.  Please let me know how we can improve this one.  Thank you. Neil

http://www.soundclick.com/html5/v3/playe...83833&q=hi

 
Salt and Light

Music arranged by:  Sarah Noll

Words: Neil Sleevi



Verse 1

Lord, set our hearts ablaze for You 

So all the world will see

Your city set upon a hill

As bright as bright can be

Lord, flood our lives with heaven's light

Your fire in us a brilliant sight

A lighthouse guiding ships at night

In storms and troubled sea


Verse 2

Use us, Oh Lord, to salt the Earth

With Your eternal zest

Enable us to spread Your word

To those who are distressed

Let us dispense Your saving grace,

To season lives and leave Your trace,

A taste of You to change this place,

So many might be blessed
 

Verse 3

O Lord, we welcome and embrace

The daily help you bring

We pray that all we say and do

Will honor You as king

Let You alone be who we show

Revealing You so others know

That You're our inner peace and glow

And You're our cause to sing!

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  Make A Joyful Noise (Psalm 100)
Posted by: novice62 - 02-09-2017, 07:36 PM - Forum: Lyric Critiques - Replies (2)

 ALL:  Here's one that can use the benefit of your recommendations and proposed edits ...it is intended as a congregational hymn   CVCVC ......Thank you!  Neil

See far below for latest version for critique and recommendations.......short Psalm...short song....Thanks,  Neil



Make A Joyful Noise (Psalm 100)


Chorus:

Make a joyful noise to the Lord
Sing out for all He’s worth

His love endures forever
So shout O all the earth!

Verse 1:

Let’s serve Lord Jehovah in gladness
Come into His presence in song
Jehovah God has made us
We're sheep and to Him we belong
  

Chorus

Verse 2:

Come, enter His gates with your praises
Give thanks to Jehovah's name
His faithfulness continues
To each generation the same.

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  You Rescued Me
Posted by: Out of the Fray - 02-08-2017, 11:15 PM - Forum: Song Critiques - Replies (7)

This song was originally written by the one and only Beagle. HE took a leap of faith and sent it to us. We mad a couple of changes and did a really bad cell phone recording last night at rehearsal. Be blunt, honest, and truthful. Hopefully we didn't butcher his work too bad.
Thanks Beagle for trusting us with your baby  Big Grin



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  Bring Forth Your Light
Posted by: johnlee2185 - 02-08-2017, 08:35 PM - Forum: Lyric Critiques - Replies (2)

Hello everyone I'm new here. I've been wanting to get critique on my lyrics. Thanks.

Bring Forth Your Light

 

(Verse 1)

In my battles

You’ve calmed the storm

In my weakness

You’ve shown me

How I can be transform

 

(Pre-Chorus)

And through it all

You’ve always put up a fight

In this heart

You endlessly pour into my life

 

(Chorus)

Your light will pierce me to rise

Beyond mountains and skies

Break down the fears inside my heart

Your light will pierce me to shine

Through the darkness that binds

Break down the chains inside my soul

Bring forth Your Light

Bring forth Your light

 

(Verse 2)

In my selfishness

You’ve soften it with your love

In my loneliness

You’ve gave me hope to endure

To provide new beginnings

With each open door

 

(Pre-Chorus)

(Chorus)

 

(Bridge x3)

Your light will shine through the ages

Your light will shine in this present time

Your light will shine across future generations

 
(Chrous)

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  Jesus Rescued Me
Posted by: ronnief63 - 02-06-2017, 11:47 AM - Forum: Song Critiques - Replies (3)

This is a song that is kinda my testimony song, because for most of the 70s, I played in a band, played in the bars and night clubs. Then I woke up one day and said, this lifestyle is not gonna get me to heaven, so I got out of the bars and found a love for Southern Gospel music.  
http://www.soundclick.com/ronniefields

Jesus Rescued Me

I remember a time of smoke filled barrooms, I used to be part of the band, 
and alot of times, I didn't worry about the pay, except the drink that I held in my hand.
Then driving home that night, not knowing how I got there, not knowing he had a plan for me,
but you see, two thousand years ago, on a hill called Mt. Calvary, I found out Jesus rescued me.

Chorus:

I found out that Jesus rescued me, 
from sin's prison, he has set me free.
I'm not the same old man that I used to be,
I found out that Jesus rescued me.

Now I'm looking for that time, that he'll split that eastern sky,
and come to take his children home.
Where we'll walk through gates of pearl, onto the streets of gold,
where for ever, we'll be free to roam.
Where we won't have a care, we'll  have a mansion so fare,
with an address like, Glory Avenue.
Now I know why he saved me, it's because that he loved me,
I found out that Jesus Rescued me.

Repeat Chorus:

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  My Son
Posted by: Michael Ford - 02-05-2017, 11:29 PM - Forum: Song Critiques - Replies (3)

This song is about Jesus crucifixion from God's point of view.  I tried to imagine how it would be if that was my son.

My Son

He walked into the courtyard where they tied Him
The people there were screaming for His blood
The lashes beat down and ripped His flesh away
His father saw the agony and He said

Chorus:
I want to reach down and take your pain away
Remove this bitter cup, still I know this must be done
And the heavens mourned as God cried
And the heavens mourned as He cried

They laid Hom on the cross where they tied Him
The people there were yelling crucify
The hammer slammed down, nails pierced His hands and feet
While His father looked on, tears fell from heaven

Chorus:
I want to reach down and take your pain away
Oh remove this bitter cup, still I know this must be done
And the heavens mourned as God cried
And He cried
He cried, yes He cried
Oh He cried
He cried, He cried

For God so loved the world
He gave His only begotten Son
That whosoever believeth in Him
Shall not perish, but have everlasting life

God cried
He cried, yes He cried
He cried
As His Son died, He cried

Michael

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  Let It Flow
Posted by: Michael Ford - 02-05-2017, 08:58 PM - Forum: Song Critiques - Replies (3)

Critic please.

Let It Flow

Walking in the shadows
Of this fallen land
Worries of this sinful man
Weigh heavy on my mind
Waiting for the moment
You rescue me from here
I long to watch the world
As it quickly disappears

Chorus:
Carry me across the universe
To the land where I'll never grow old
Your presence will be my light
As I worship before Your throne
Standing on floors of gold
As I praise You my living Lord
And I'll live beside the river
As Your water forever flows
Let it flow

It won't be long
Before I leave this world
Like a meteor
Racing cross the heavens
I'll watch this world
As I leave the atmosphere
As it grows so small
And quickly disappears

Chorus:
Carry me across the universe
To the land where I'll never grow old
Your presence will be my light
As I worship before Your throne
Standing on floors of gold
As I praise You my living Lord
And I'll live beside the river
As Your water forever flows
Let it flow
Carry me across the universe
Where Your water forever flows
Carry me across the universe
Let it flow

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  Hello all.
Posted by: Michael Ford - 02-05-2017, 04:13 PM - Forum: Hello My Name is... - Replies (4)

My name is Michael and I have been a song writer since the mid 1970's.  I have also been recording my own music since the late 70's.  Started on an track reel to reel and went through different recording formats as they developed over the years.  I currently use Protools and Reason, but use Reason the most because of the integration of virtual instruments.  I have owned a couple of small commercial studios, but I just record in a room at the house, which does not have any acoustic sound treatment or anything else special about it.  I see that we are required to critic 3 songs for each one we post.  I'll do my best, but I am old school and do much better in person.  I ran a songwriting group for a year, and love to interact with people, but I have a little trouble interacting to a computer, so bear with me if my answers are kind of short.  Sometimes I just don't know how to tell l someone what I think they should do with a song.  It is so subjective.  Sometimes it just isn't a style I can relate to, or know much about, like hymn writing.  I'm no pro writer, just another guy who loves to write the music God puts in my head.

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  All I Ever Wanted- old song for review
Posted by: Michael Ford - 02-05-2017, 12:15 AM - Forum: Song Critiques - Replies (4)

This is my first post.  Hello everyone.  Wrote this song in the late 90's.  What do you think?

All I Ever Wanted

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  ***I WILL WAIT***
Posted by: Merziantwist - 02-04-2017, 04:38 PM - Forum: Lyric Critiques - Replies (4)

http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=13514403

I WILL WAIT

Words and Music by Peter Merz

When trouble comes for me
And my nights seem comfortless
I will lift my eyes to the skies
Hope will come from the Holy Three-In-One

PRE-CHORUS
And when my faith is unmoved
God’s love will always find me
When I cling to His truth
His light will shatter the darkness

CHORUS
Here am I upon my rock
And here I'll always stay
I will wait for my God
I will wait come what may
Here am I upon my rock
Through trials and through storms
I will wait for my God
For He's opened Heaven's door

When stormy waves confront me
And I’m falling apart now from the stress
I will lift my head to the heights
Storms may moan, but I see Heaven’s throne

PRE-CHORUS
And when my faith is unmoved
God’s love will always find me
When I cling to His truth
His light will shatter the darkness

REPEAT CHORUS

BRIDGE
Like Job, I'll learn to be patient
And I will not turn back faithless
Like John, I’ll keep the faith, never quit
And hold on to the Rock of Ages

REPEAT CHORUS

©2017 Scribe And Sage Music (BMI).  All Rights Reserved.

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